Tag: Childhood Memories

Emma’s Story | The Beginning of Goodbye

Emma’s Story | The Beginning of Goodbye

Emma’s Story is a collection of reflections that explore the memories, emotions, and moments that shaped Emma long before—and beyond—the events of Unfinished Melody. In this reflection, Emma looks back on one childhood conversation that quietly changed the way she viewed love, family and goodbyes.


The Beginning of Goodbye

I remember the day my mom told me the dinners at the McGuires’ were stopping.
She came to me. It was February 1988.
Just after Valentine’s Day.
Josh had given me a charm bracelet, a single red rose and a box of chocolates.
I gave him a box of chocolates and a card.
So when mom came to me, I was devastated when she told me.
I asked her why and she said that all the moms of the band were going on the tour with them because they were all so young.
I believed her.
Josh was the youngest, so it made sense at least for Mrs. McGuire to go.
I cried that night.


A Second Family

I would not just miss Josh.
I would miss Mrs. McGuire.
I would miss Josh’s sisters.
His brother.
His dad.
I grew close to Mrs. McGuire because she babysat me and Mitchell and at one point Molly too.
She kept us from the time my dad left until we were old enough to stay home by ourselves.
Molly had a lot of after-school activities, theater and music and she was 4 years older than me, so she wasn’t able to watch after us that much.
I loved staying there.
I loved helping her in the kitchen.
She treated me like one of her own.
And then of course, there was Josh.
I think at age two was when I started staying there along with Mitchell.
They were the same age, so it wasn’t until around age eight and ten that we started really taking notice of each other.
I always thought he was cute even before that.
And he seemed to think I was too.
Mitchell would sometimes get jealous when Josh would want to sit beside me at the table instead of him.
They were best friends.
At age ten for me, and twelve for Josh was when we started holding hands and being sort of affectionate toward each other.
There are so many memories of birthday parties, cookouts, family dinners, and vacations together.
I am thankful I still have all the pictures.


Looking Back

By fall of 1988, mom and Mitchell were getting ready to go to what she said was church service. They were dressed up so I believed them.
The part that was weird was that it was at night.
We always attended church in the morning. Usually, ten or eleven o’clock.
I thought it was weird, but mom insisted that it was something the church had recently started up.
It was also weird that she didn’t ask me to go.
When church was involved, we had to go. It was a non-negotiable.
I didn’t think a whole lot about it for a while.
Not that I didn’t want to go, necessarily, I just was glad that I didn’t have to go twice a day.
Sometimes I would go to church with Olivia.
I enjoyed that.
I enjoyed her church almost better than the church we attended so I started asking if I could go to church every Sunday with Olivia.
Mom thought that was a great idea.
She was almost too energetic about the idea.
So, every Saturday night I would spend the night with Olivia and go to church the next morning.
Then in late 1989 when I started dating Adam, I started going to his church.
All the while, mom and Mitchell were going to church twice every Sunday.
Mom was happy that I was going to church with Adam.
Again, almost too happy.
I remember thinking it was really weird.
One night, I saw them dressed a little more casual for church than normal and I asked them where they were going and she said, “church, of course.”
“Wearing that?” I had asked.
She said that church was much more casual these days.
I believed her.
But also a part of me had become suspicious.
By then, those evening church services were every other Sunday. Not every Sunday.
That was also when the dress code had changed.
Eventually the evening church services were cut down to once a month.
I saw Josh once in a while when he would come home on tour breaks.
Thanksgiving and Christmas. Even Valentine’s Day.
I saw him for the last time at Olivia’s birthday in July of 1989 prior to me dating Adam.
Every time I saw him, it was always so good.
But there was something I noticed.
He was changing.
Not just in the growing-up sense.
At the time, I thought fame was changing him.
Looking back, I think I was seeing what happens when two people who were once inseparable suddenly have very different lives.
I had been afraid the distance would change us.
I got one last kiss at Olivia’s birthday party.
I hoped he would call or write to me, but I never got a call or a letter in the mail.
He got swept into the fame and we were no more.
I was devastated once again when I realized this.
Accepted it.
Then in December of 1989, Adam came into the picture.
I figured since Josh had not reached out to me by phone or letter, I would just move on.
Obviously, he had.
Adam wasn’t a rebound guy though.
He was the one who made my heart beat again.
He was there for four years.
College scholarship for basketball across the country at Pepperdine College.
We tried to make it work after he left for college, but it was too hard.
The distance was too much.
I was starting to get a complex.
It made me not want to love anyone because everyone I seemed to love would eventually leave.
My dad.
Josh.
The rest of the McGuires.
And then Adam, even if leaving wasn’t what either of us wanted.


Want to read Unfinished Melody? Get your copy here: Unfinished Melody — Amazon 

Want to learn more about Emma and Josh? Read About Emma and Josh

Learn more about Unfinished Melody here: About the Book

 

The Night Something Changed

The Night Something Changed

This is one of Emma’s childhood diary entries — written at age ten — capturing a quiet moment that stayed with her long after it ended. At the time, she didn’t have the words for what she was feeling. She only knew it mattered.

~ ~ ~

November 5, 1985

Dear Diary,

I think something important happened tonight. Or maybe it just felt important to me.

I went to Mitchell’s basketball game. That doesn’t happen very often because he goes to a private all-boys school and I go to public school. Mom said it was a treat, so I tried to be on my best behavior.

Mitchell told me Josh would be there, but I didn’t know why he felt the need to tell me that. He’s weird sometimes.

When Mom and I got there, Josh’s mom was already sitting in the bleachers. She waved at my mom, and Josh was sitting beside her.

We walked over and Mom sat next to Josh’s mom. I sat on the other side of Mom. Josh smiled at me, and then he nudged his mom and pointed in my direction. She nodded, and he stood up and came over to sit next to me.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hey,” I said back. I looked down at my sneakers because my face felt warm.

“Who do you think will make the winning shot?” he asked.

I shrugged. “Hopefully Mitchell.”

“I hope so too,” he said.

We watched the game for a little while after that. The gym was loud, and the whistle kept making me jump. The floor squeaked every time someone ran past, and the scoreboard lights blinked so bright it hurt my eyes if I stared at them too long.

Josh leaned forward with his elbows on his knees and pointed at the court. “That’s Mitchell,” he said, even though I already knew. I nodded anyway.

Our arms were really close. Like almost touching. I tried not to move because I didn’t want to mess it up.

Someone behind us started clapping really loud, and it startled me. Josh laughed a little and looked at me. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” I said, even though my heart was beating fast for no reason.

At halftime, Josh’s mom asked if we wanted popcorn. He went with her, and when he came back, he handed me the bag first.

“Here,” he said. “You can have some.”

“Thanks,” I said. I tried to grab just a little, but my fingers touched his, and I pulled my hand back really fast. He didn’t say anything, but he smiled.

I liked that smile.

When the game started again, Mitchell made a basket, and I clapped so hard my hands stung. Josh clapped too and yelled Mitchell’s name. I liked that he did that.

Toward the end of the game, Josh leaned over again.

“If Mitchell makes the last shot,” he said, “you have to sit next to me at the next game too.”

I blinked. “What if our moms sit between us again?”

He shrugged. “Then I’ll move.”

I didn’t know why that made my chest feel warm.

“Okay,” I said.

Mitchell didn’t make the last shot. The buzzer went off, and everyone stood up at the same time.

Josh smiled at me. “Still counts,” he said. Then, quieter, “I’m moving anyway.”

I smiled back before I even realized I was doing it.

After the game, everyone started talking and moving around. Mom stood up to talk to Josh’s mom, and I thought Josh would go back over there, but he stayed next to me for a second longer.

“Hey, Em?” he said.

“Yeah?”

“I’m glad you came tonight.”

“Me too,” I said.

And I meant it.

On the way home, Mom asked if I had fun. I said yes, but I didn’t tell her why. I didn’t know how.

All I know is that sitting next to Josh felt different than it used to. Like something changed, but I couldn’t see it — only feel it.

I think I’ll remember tonight for a long time.

— Emma

~ ~ ~

Read more about Emma and Josh: https://atomic-temporary-134283154.wpcomstaging.com/explore-the-world-of-unfinished-melody/

Read more Diary Entries: The Day I Realized I Like Josh McGuire | The Summer Cookout

Listen to the song that inspired the story: Please Don’t Go Girl NKOTB from the guys who sang the song: https://www.nkotb.com/

The Summer Cookout — When Josh Started Teasing Me

The Summer Cookout — When Josh Started Teasing Me

In this diary entry, ten-year-old Emma remembers a summer cookout that seemed ordinary at the time—but now feels like one of the earliest moments when she sensed something different in the way Josh looked at her, teased her, and lingered just a little too close. It’s sweet, simple, and the beginning of something she didn’t yet understand.

Dear Diary,

Tonight we had a cookout at the McGuires’ house. Our moms said it’s “the last big one before school starts,” which is just another way of saying summer is ending and I’m not ready. But anyway, something weird happened.

Josh was acting… different.

Not in a bad way.
Just… different.

He kept teasing me more than usual.
Not the “you’re annoying” kind he saves for Molly.
It was more like… I don’t know how to describe it.

Like he was trying to get my attention.

At one point, we were all on the lawn playing that beanbag toss game Mr. McGuire made. Josh and Mitchell were on one team, and I was supposed to be on Molly’s team, but she went inside to get a soda, so it ended up just me vs. the boys.

Josh kept stealing glances at me every time he threw.
And when he got a perfect shot, he grinned at me like he was waiting for me to be impressed.

I pretended I wasn’t.
(But I was.)

Then he bumped my shoulder and said,

“Better keep up, Sinclair.”

SINCLAIR.
He NEVER calls me that unless he’s teasing.

I bumped him back and said I wasn’t scared.

I was lying.
Not about being scared of losing—
I was scared because my stomach did this weird swoopy thing when he smiled at me.

Later, when we were getting s’mores, I dropped my marshmallow in the grass (of course), and Josh said,

“Good thing I’m here to save the day.”

Then he roasted one perfectly, slid it onto my graham cracker, and handed it to me with this look.

Like… that look boys give girls in movies right before they do something important.

Except he didn’t do anything.
He just smirked and said,

“Try not to drop this one.”

I pretended to roll my eyes, but my face felt hot.

I don’t know what any of this means.
Maybe nothing.
Maybe something.

But tonight, I felt… noticed.

By him.

And now I can’t stop thinking about it.

—Emma

💗 Emma’s Diary is a glimpse into Emma’s childhood memories from Unfinished Melody.
Here you can explore the world of the novel Unfinished Melody or return to Diary Entry #1

Listen to the song that inspired the story here: Please Don’t Go Girl NKOTB from the guys who sang the song: https://www.nkotb.com/