Some moments stay with us forever. In this diary entry from November 7, 1985, ten-year-old Emma writes about the day everything changed—her first kiss, her first heartbreak, and the quiet beginning of a love that would shape her life.

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November 7, 1985

Dear Diary,

Today was a strange day.

Josh came over and told me he’s joining a band. A real one. He said it like it was the best news in the world, and I could tell he was really excited. I was excited for him too, but my stomach felt funny at the same time. Like when you’re happy and sad all at once.

He said it’s a boyband and that someday they might go on tour. I don’t really know what touring means, but I know it means he won’t always be here.

That part made my chest hurt.

I didn’t mean to cry, but I did. The tears just came out before I could stop them. Josh held my hands and asked me what was wrong, and I tried to explain, but the words felt hard to say.

I told him I didn’t want him to go.

Then I told him something I’ve been thinking about for a while.

I told him I like him.

My face felt hot when I said it, and I couldn’t look at him. I thought maybe it would be awkward or he would laugh, but he didn’t. He just looked at me in this quiet way, like he was really listening.

Then he kissed me.

It was soft and gentle, and it only lasted a second, but my heart started beating really fast, like it was trying to run somewhere. Everything felt quiet, even though I could still hear the clock ticking in the kitchen.

I think that was my first kiss.

He told me I’ll always be his girl. He said he won’t forget me, even when he’s in the band and doing big things. He promised.

I don’t know what will happen next. I don’t know how long he’ll be here or how far away he’ll go someday. But I know that tonight, when I close my eyes, I’ll remember the way it felt.

And I think I’ll always remember it.

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This diary entry follows [Emma’s basketball game diary from November 5, 1985] The Night Something Changed, where everything still felt simple. You can explore more of Emma’s early memories in the [Emma’s Diary collection] Emma’s Diary.